Make them go away…
Aug25
Keep telling yourself, Randie… there’s money and a Vespid at the end of your courage. They’ll be gone soon enough… the gnomes, that is.
Keep telling yourself, Randie… there’s money and a Vespid at the end of your courage. They’ll be gone soon enough… the gnomes, that is.
Gotta psyche THE GNOMES as well as yourself, Randie. As you pack them, give them each a name and tell them, “Mommy made you two to be good little boys. Don’t disappoint mommy or she’ll be aaaaangry!”
That way, none of the gnomes will ever come back to “mommy”.
Good suggestion… Randie tries (hard) to have the upper hand (attached to a hammer).
There must be at least a little satisfaction of putting them into a “coffin.”
“Two times one is two, of course,
And it must occur to you,
You get an even number
Every time you multiply by two.”
—“Elementary My Dear,” Schoolhouse Rock.
I love Schoolhouse Rock. I grew up on it. The weird thing is… I would always see the same 2 or 3. I knew that there were other “episodes,” but it was always the same 3 that ran on Saturday mornings in my area. Meh.
If you calculate 150 “coffins” x 2 gnomes each… it gets you an even number of gnomes. There needs to be a song about this… a spooky song… but a song, none-the-less.
How ’bout:
“Half a league, half a league
Half a league onward
Inside the Boxes of Death
Were the Three Hundred.”
—from Tennyson.
Okay, well…
Two-by-two, two-by-two,
Two-by-two onward,
Into the Boxes of Death
Go the Three Hundred.
“Forward, the Gnomes hand-made!”
Go for the cash!” she said.
Into the Boxes of Death
Go the Three Hundred
“Forward, the Gnomes hand-made!”
Wasn’t she quite dismayed?
Not though it made her blue,
Her headache thundered.
Hers not to let it show,
Hers not to voice her woe,
Hers just to get some dough.
Into the Boxes of Death
Go the Three Hundred.
Statues to the right of her
Statues to the left of her
Statues in front of her
Had Randie blundered?
Vision of Vespids bring her bliss,
Was it worth all of this?
Into the Boxes of Death,
Into the deep abyss
Went the Three Hundred.
When is the money paid?
Oh, the joys of retail trade!
She sat and wondered.
Shipping the evil cavalcade,
Shipping the Gnomes hand-made,
Rotten Three Hundred.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone use the ‘Charge of the Light Brigade’ as the basis of a post, much less done so well! I applaud in your direction, Robert Nowall!
“Eyes on the prize, eyes on the prize, thoughts on the goal and eyes on the prize!” to quote my old gym teacher. Back before my asthma I was a pretty good runner so I got a lot of advice like that, but I find it very relevant to any difficult task.